You only have to turn on the TV to see behaviours and values we would never encourage in our children. When our politicians and leaders speak to each other with contempt and disrespect, or when influencers and role models behave poorly to their peers, what are we teaching the next generation about how to treat others?
Reality TV frequently places conflict, confrontation and personal drama at the centre of entertainment, often rewarding the very behaviours we discourage in children. Additionally, social media platforms and algorithms portray a false sense of reality, spread misinformation, and affirm dangerous gender roles within society, exacerbating the mental health issues of vulnerable people.
So why do we choose to watch these shows and interact with these social media platforms? Lisa Curry, a triple Olympian and health and wellbeing entrepreneur once stated, “Be careful who you follow on Instagram. Be careful who you aspire to be. Because not everything is as it seems on social media…Humans are ruining humankind. We need to be kind to people.” From our earliest years, social interactions provide opportunities to learn how to engage with others. As children grow, the influences around them expand beyond their immediate families to include peers, educators, public figures and increasingly, the digital world.
So how can we support the mental health of young people? One place we can start is with how we treat each other and value the contribution of other people on our own lives. We must also consider how their words and actions are interpreted by children and young people. A 2017 study published in Frontiers in Psychology explored how infants develop the ability to actively participate in social interactions through games such as peekaboo. The researchers observed that, as infants developed from four to six months of age, they demonstrated greater active participation in these interactions. If something as simple as playing peekaboo, ‘Where’s your nose?’, or mirror play can provide opportunities for learning and social connection in infancy, imagine the influence technology, social media and reality TV might have on young people as they grow.
As role models, adults have a responsibility to model the behaviours we hope to see in our children. They learn from how we speak, how we handle disagreements and how we treat others. We cannot expect children to consistently demonstrate kindness, empathy and respect if the adults and role models around them fail to demonstrate these behaviours themselves. When we model kindness, empathy and respect, we give children examples they can carry into their own lives.
So, I urge you all to please take the lead in making kindness part of your children’s everyday lives. Every kind word, thoughtful gesture or moment of compassion sets an example. Our children are watching and we can show them how much kindness matters every day.
Danny Mayson-Kinder, Founder and CEO of the b kinder foundation.
